The Perfect Invader
by Inferno Fire Lord
Summary: Part 1 of 3. The Tallest send an experimental Perfect Invader to train Zim.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I don't own anything you know I don't. Except Zak. Him I own.

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On the Massive, the Tallest looked down at a certain Irken. He was short, about Zim's height, with the same eyes, but this Irken was different. His skin was slightly darker green, he had a vicious gleam in his eyes, and his antennae were completely straight. Instead of a standard uniform, he wore a cyber-suit exoskeleton. It was colored deep red, and black on the arms and legs. His PAK was also black, with dark red spots.

"You have done well, Zak" said Red, "You have overcome every test, every trial, everything that has been thrown at you."

"Yes," said Purple, "So far it seems that our project was a success. But we have one last test for you."

The Irken, Zak, looked up at the Tallest and grinned evilly. "Just tell me what to do."

"You know about Zim, right?" asked Red. Upon seeing Zak nod, he continued. "We sent Zim off to the far reaches of the galaxy to get him out of the way. But he still bothers us constantly."

Purple nodded. "We want you to go to Earth, find Zim, and beat some sense into him. Train him, whip him into shape. If you can make Zim competent, then the project will be a complete success."

Zak grinned again. "Where is he?"

A few hours later, Zak was in his personal ship, heading toward Earth. Zak was an Invader, but not just any Invader. At a young age, Zak had been chosen for the so-called "Perfect Invader" Project. This was a top-secret project headed by the Tallest themselves. At a young age, Zak had been fitted with all sorts of machinery, including having his skin and organs partially fused with machinery, multiple optical enhancement lenses, weapons integrated into his cyber-exoskeleton, and more. He had been put through superior elite training and passed every test with ease. The Tallest had thrown several more challenges his way, but he had overcome them all. Zak had not yet been listed as an official Invader, since the Tallest had decided to give him this one last test. Zak hit the button to open the warp drive that would bring him to Earth. As he entered the wormhole, he chuckled to himself.


	2. Zak's arrival

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Except Zak.

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Zim sat in his seat, ignoring Ms. Bitters' doom rant as usual. The Tallest had contacted him earlier that day, and told him about Zak coming to train him. They had said that despite his mission, he was not technically encoded as an Invader anymore, and that if he accepted (and passed) Zak's training, he would be pardoned of all his crimes and his Invader class would be restored. They had cut the transmission before Zim had had a chance to respond. Zim was still thinking about what they had said, and the more he thought about it, the more it made sense. He was an Invader, but the encounter with Sizz-Lor had reminded him that the Tallest had forgotten to change his ranking back after he quit his banishment. The Tallest just wanted him to prove his mettle before officially changing his rank back to Invader.

As Zim reassured himself of these things, Ms. Bitters had gotten on the phone with the principal and was now complaining angrily. Zim was snapped out of his thoughts by Ms. Bitters slamming down the phone. "Class!" she shouted angrily, "We have a new student joining us today."

At that moment the door slammed open and in marched what appeared to be a normal human. He wore a red shirt with black sleeves, and black pants. His hair was black and unkempt. His eyes, though human, were piercing and red. He turned to look at the class before his gaze stopped on Zim. "I am Zak." He stated calmly. "I just got into town. My, eh, family moves around quite a bit so I won't be here long. But while I'm here…you'd better make sure you stay out of my way" he finished dangerously.

"All right Zak, since you won't be here long you can have Willy's old seat." She pointed to the desk in the back of the room that had belonged to Willy before he had become the student president. Zak marched to the back, dropping a small piece of paper on Zim's desk as he passed.

Zim snatched the paper. It was a note: _Meet me behind the building after skool lets out._ 'So, he's the one the Tallest spoke of,' Zim thought, and turned to look back at Zak.

At lunch that day, Dib was bothering Zim as usual. This time, Dib had taken to pelting Zim with the cafeteria food, which had taken to eating part of Zim's wig. Dib was about to launch the mashed potatoes when a lunch tray flew out of nowhere and beaned Dib right in the back of his giant head, knocking him forward into the plate of mashed potatoes, which immediately proceeded to start devouring his nose right off his face. Gaz snickered at his pain and Zim could be seen laughing hysterically. Also laughing, although nobody could see it, was Zak.

After skool let out, Zim snuck around back, making absolutely sure Dib wasn't following him. Zak was already there. "Zim, I'm sure you know why I'm here. The Tallest sent me here to train you. We will begin immediately. Take me to your base." Zim was a bit surprised at Zak's straightforward approach, and was about to make a comment when Zak snapped at him to get moving, so he decided that it would be better to speak with Zak in the safety of his base anyway.

Zak was less than impressed with Zim's base, but made no comment as Zim led him up the walk. Unbeknownst to Zim, Dib was watching from the bushes.

"What is Zak doing with Zim?" Dib asked himself quietly "Zak just got here, so the only way is if-" Dib was suddenly cut off. Zak had launched a grappling hook (hidden in his cyber-exoskeleton) from the back of his wrist, which had grabbed on to Dib's coat. With a snap of his wrist, Zak sent Dib flying. Zim could only watch, astounded, as Dib came crashing down a few yards outside Zim's gate. Zak laughed briefly before following Zim into the house.

Once down in the lab, Zim removed his contacts and wig, and Zak's human form faded away to reveal his true self. "Okay, Zak," said Zim, "What is this all about?"

"Like I said, the Tallest sent me here to train you." Zak explained calmly.

"And how did you do that thing with Dib?" Zim demanded.

"My antennae have been greatly enhanced, just like the rest of my body. I have all sorts of weapons integrated into the cyber-exoskeleton I wear. Plus my sensory organs are far more sensitive than a normal Irken's. I could hear that large-headed kid talking to himself so I tossed him away. But enough with the introductions. Your training begins now."


	3. The Final Session

Disclaimer: How many times must I say it? I don't own Zim.

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Several days later………

Zim was exhausted. Zak's training was harsh and unrelenting. Even though Irkens did not need sleep, Zim at least wished he could take a break to relax a bit. And to make things worse, Dib seemed to be getting more aggressive lately.

A few days after Zak had arrived, Dib finally decided to take action on his suspicions of Zak. He snuck out of lunch early, stole a bucket from the janitor, and filled it with water. He then returned to Ms. Bitters' classroom. Fortunately for him, the evil teacher was not there. Dib quietly went to the back of the room and poured the bucket of water all over Zak's chair. "Now, if this water burns Zak, then he really is an alien." Dib said. "Am I _still_ talking to myself? Why do I keep doing that?" He then hid the bucket and went back to lunch. Gaz did ask him where he'd been, but the bell rang before he could stammer a reply.

Upon returning to Ms. Bitters' class, Dib immediately turned in his seat to watch Zak. As expected, Zak was burned by the water upon sitting in his seat. He jumped up and ran back and forth, yelping in pain while clutching his ass. Zak seemed to calm down much faster than Zim, however, and swapped his seat with a spare one off to the side before sitting down again. As usual, Dib was the only one who saw Zak's pain, but that was all he needed. Zim, meanwhile, saw Dib watching Zak and grinning and drew the appropriate conclusion.

After skool, while Zak and Zim were walking to Zim's base, Zak asked about the incident in the classroom. "I sat in something wet and suddenly felt like my ass was on fire."

Zim snarled. "It was the Dib. There can be no other explanation. And the wet stuff was water. I'm not exactly sure how or why, but liquid water burns us. Once we get back to the lab I'll show you how to protect yourself from it."

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Once back at the lab, Zim made good on his promise and got Zak a paste shielding. Once that was done, Zim told Zak that "now Dib knows you're an Irken too. He'll try everything he can think of to expose us, so GET OFF OF ME!" The last part was spoken not to Zak, but to Gir who had decided to climb up onto Zim's back. Gir jumped down and stood by Zim's side, staring at Zak.

"WHO IS THAT!" Gir shouted, pointing at Zak and turning to look at Zim.

"That is-"

"WHO IS IT?"

"That is-"

"WHO IS IT?"

Zim waited for Gir to stop shouting, then spoke through gritted teeth. "That is Zak. The Tallest sent him."

"Oooooooooh" Gir said quietly. "I'm gonna go play with Pig, 'kay?"

Zim slapped his hand to his forehead and sighed. "Okay, Gir, you do that."

As Gir walked off, Zak looked at Zim. "What was _that_?"

"That was Gir, my, eh, SIR unit, sort of. The Tallest told me he was advanced, but now I'm not so sure…"

"Riiight," Zak said dismissively. "Anyway, back to your training. You are making progress, but very slowly. Although I do have an idea that may help you learn faster. You have already heard all the lessons I am trying to teach you, so let's see if a duel will get it into your head."

"A duel?" Zim asked, confused.

"Yes," said Zak. "We shall do battle, one-on-one. Hopefully this will drill the lessons into your head."

"Fine." Zim said, then led Zak to the hologram chamber. "We can battle here."

Zak nodded, then rose up on his spider legs and took a battle stance. Zim also rose up on his spider legs. Zim made the first move, charging Zak, who knocked him back with one of his legs. Zak struck next, knocking Zim to the ground. Zak then started stabbing at Zim with his spider legs. Zim managed to dodge out of the way, but Zak didn't give Zim any chance to counter-attack. The battle went on like this for over an hour. Gir entered at about the halfway point, slurping his Suckmonkey, but even he knew better than to interfere. So, he sat down on the ground and watched. Actually, he didn't "watch" so much as slurp his Suckmonkey noisily, but he did glance up every once in a while before returning to his drink.

As he dodged Zak's attacks, the realization finally hit Zim. All the things he'd done in the past were _not_ things to be proud of. In that moment of clarity, of realization, Zim began to feel regret for the first time in his entire life. Now that he realized this, he could fight back against Zak's relentless attacks. He ejected a laser pistol from his PAK and caught it in his right hand. He then rolled directly under Zak to the opposite side of the chamber. Zak turned to see him, then used his spider legs to leap across the chamber at Zim. Zim aimed the pistol and fired. The blast struck Zak right in the chest, knocking him out of the air. Zak fell to the ground and looked at Zim, still clutching the pistol. Zak stood up and slowly began to clap.

"Excellent, Zim," he said. "You actually managed to land a hit on me. That is something no one has ever been able to do before. Congratulations. Did this battle teach you what I've been trying to show you?"

Zim looked at Zak, then spoke only one word: "Yes."

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A/N: Just so you know, Zim wasn't affected in any major way at all by this. Only thing is, he's no longer incompetent.


	4. The Success of Zak

A/N: This is the final chapter of Part 1. I know it wasn't that long, but this was just meant to be an intro of sorts. Part 2 will be longer.

Disclaimer: Why do I have to keep saying this? Zim does not belong to me.

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It was about a week after Zim had passed the duel with Zak. Since that time, he had grown stronger and better. He was still his same old self, of course, but now he was competent, and actually capable of reaching his full potential.

Over the past week, both Zim and Zak had had several encounters with Dib, each one ending up with Dib being defeated and/or humiliated. By now, Dib had given up on Zak for his own safety, and decided instead to focus on Zim.

Now, however, the two Irkens stood before Zim's transmission screen in his lab. Zak had determined that Zim's training was now complete, and it was time to report in to the Tallest.

"My Tallest," said Zak, "I have called you to report on my success. I have successfully trained Zim. He has passed my test."

The Tallest looked at each other. "Wow. I didn't expect this so soon." Red muttered quietly.

Purple nodded. "Well Zim, since you passed Zak's test I guess its time to hold up our end of the deal." Purple signaled to someone offscreen. A cable flew down from the ceiling and attached to Zim's PAK (just like the flashback in the Sizz-Lor episode). The electricity went down the cable, and the screen showing Zim's ranking changed from "Food Services" back to "Invader Class". The cable then retracted back into the ceiling.

"As for you, Zak," said Red, "You will receive your reward and recognition as the Perfect Invader upon your return to the Massive." Zak grinned and nodded as the Tallest cut the transmission.

Purple turned to Red. "I can't believe we're going to grant Zim a pardon."

Red groaned. "Yeah, but we did make a promise. Besides, he passed Zak's training, right?"

Purple shrugged. "I guess. Ah, I'm hungry let's go eat."

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Back on Earth, Dib was preparing for an assault on Zim's base. He looked over his infiltration materials one last time before setting off. "Stealth suit? Check. Non-flash camera? Check. Extra roll of film? Check. All right, I'm ready."

Dib left his house, ignoring Gaz who was watching a commercial for Bloaty's, and headed down the street. He activated the stealth suit a couple blocks from Zim's house, becoming a mere blur of the scenery (like at the beginning of "Zim eats Waffles").

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Zak stepped outside Zim's door. "Well, I'd best be on my way. The Tallest are waiting." A jet pack emerged from Zak's PAK. He and Zim saluted each other as Zak lifted off, rocketing out towards his ship which was hovering safely out of sight in the outer levels of Earth's atmosphere. He entered the cockpit, and blasted away. As he left the atmosphere, he again pressed the button to open the wormhole. As he entered it, he grinned to himself once more.

Zim watched Zak lift off, then turned to re-enter his house. Dib slipped in right after him, just before Zim closed the door. Dib followed Zim toward the entrance to the lab, making sure to remain completely silent. Zim was just about to enter the lab when he sensed something. His antennae twitched. Dib froze, noticing the twitch and hoping against all hope that he hadn't been noticed. Unfortunately for him, that is exactly what had happened. "Computer!" Zim shouted. "Destroy the Dib!"

The large, thick cables rushed down from the ceiling at Dib. He managed to dodge most of the cables but was struck a glancing blow by one of them. It damaged his suit, making him visible again, and caused him to drop the camera. Dib reached to grab the camera when Zim stomped on it, smashing it to pieces, and grinning sadistically.

Zim dragged Dib over to the door, opened it, and literally threw Dib out onto the lawn. Dib stood up and brushed himself off, only to get attacked by the lawn gnomes. Meanwhile, Zim watched, laughing the whole time, before walking back into his house and shutting the door.

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A/N: That's the end of Part 1. What do you think? Part 2 coming soon.


End file.
